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HoW 2 bE a fLy aZiAn?
 
 1) Be RaCiSt.
 
 2) DyE yOuR hAiR...rEdDiSh BrOwN fOr BeSt ReSuLtS ( bUt ThEn AgAiN, bLoDe
    TuRnS oUt To Be ReDdIsH--bRoWn AnYwAyZ ).
 
 3) yOu MuSt DrIvE aN aCuRa InTeGrA oR hOnDa CiViC ( oR n~E oThA' jApAnEsE
    kArZ!! ).
 
 4) nEvEr WeAr GlAsSeS OuT oF cLaSs--OnLy FOBz CaN dO sO ( cOlOrEd CoNtAcTs
    ArE rEqUiReD).
 
 5) Be RaCiSt.
 
 6) gUrLz, WeAr DaRk LiPsTiCk ( ThE bRoWnEr ThE kOoLeR--nO mAtTeR iF yOu
    EnD uP lOoKiN' lyKe YoU sTuFFeD yOuR fAcE iN cHoCoLaTe ).
 
 7) To AcHiEvE tHh NaTuRaL Look, aPpLy LaYeRz AnD LaYeRz Of MaKe-Up
    On...iF iT sTaRtS tO LooK uNnAtUrAL ( hEaVeN fOrBiD ) jUsT AppLy AnOtHeR LaYeR.
 
 8) cUrL yOuR eYeLaShEz TiLL tHeY tOuCh YoUr EyELiDz.
 
 9) NeVeR bE cAuGhT dEaD iN a GrOuP oF LeSs ThAn 10.
 
 10) Be RaCiSt!
 
 11) OnLy AdSoCiAtE w/ FeLLoW YeLLoWz.
 
 12) WhEn YoU wAnT tO sPeAk AbOuT a NoN-aSiAn InFrOnT oF tHeIr FaCe, SpEaK
    yOuR oWn LaNgUaGe VeRy LoUdLy AnD rUdELy.
 
 13) iNtErPrEt EvErY LiTtLe ThInG aS a RaCiAl iSsUe.
 
 14) NeVeR bE oN TiMe WhEn MeEtInG fRiEnDz.
 
 15) Be RaCiSt!!
 
 16) DoGg On iNtEr-RaCiAl CoUpLeZ.
 
 17) a PaGeR iS A LyFe NeCeSsItY. ( oR a CeLL pHoNe..Or BoTh).
 
 18) OnLy WeAr cLoThEz In ThE eXCiTiNg ShAdEz Of bLaCk N' wHiTe
    (OoCaIsIOnALLy CrEaM, bRoWn, GrAy aLLoWeD ).
 
 19) GurLz MuSt StArE aT eAcHOtHeR mOrE tHaN gUyZ sTaRe At ThEm.
 
 20) Be RaCiSt!!!
 
 21) aLwAyZ dReSs LyKe YoU'rE gOiN' tO a PaRtY...eVeN wHeN yOuR gOiN' tO
    wALmArT.
 
 22) hAnG oUt In CoFFee ShOpS wHeN tHeRe's nOtHiN' tO dO.
 
 23) gUrLz MuSt Be MaStErS oF bUsT-a-MoVe.
 
 24) GuYz MuSt Be MaStErS oF KiLLa iNsTiNcT oR n~E oB dA sTrEeT FiGhTa'
    GaMeZ.
 
 25) Be RaCiSt!!!!! ( hOw MaNy TiMeZ dO i NeE' 2 sAy).
 
 26) MaKe EvErY eVeNt A sOcIaL OnE--ChUrCh, SkOoL, fUnErALz...!
 
 27) GuYz ArE nOt aLLoWeD tO LeAaE tHe MaLL w/ OuT aT LeAsT oNe SeT oF
    DiGiTz...ThAt MeAnZ a PhOnE nUmBeR fOr YoU FOBz wHo DiDn'T kNo'.
 
 28) gUrLz--DrEsS sKiMpY oN a CoLd DaY sO tHaT a GuY hAa To LeNd YoU HiS
    cOaT.
 
 29) gUyS mUsT wEaR tHeIr ChOiCe Of: EtErNiTy, EsCaPe, CooL wAtEr.
 
 30) BE RACIST!!!!! ( gEt Da PoiNt YeT?? )
 
 31) aLwAyS cHaNgE yOuR pAgEr GrEeTiNg At LeAsT 3 TiMeS a DaY...sOmETiMeS
    aDd ChEeSy MuSiC fOr ThE FuLL 30 sEcOnDz To PiSs CaLLeRz Off.
 
 32) CaRrY aT LeAsT 1000 PiCtUrEz ArOuNd W/ yOu WhErEvEr YoU gO--PiCtUrEz
    OnLy Of ASIAN oF cOrRsE.
 
 33) tAkE PiCtUrEz EvErYwHeRe YoU gO...eVeN iN yOuR oWn dRiVeWaY,
    gUyS--aLwAyZ Look rUff & aLL hArD-cOrE, LiFtInG yOuR cHiN uP tO tHe LeNz, gUrLz--FaKe
    sMiLe, Or No sMiLe.
 
 34) GuYz--NeVeR SaY Hi vErBaLLy BaCk To A gUrL...eItHeR LiFt OnE EyEbRoW,
    nOd YoUr cHiN ( vErY cOcKy ), Or WiNk ( ThE MoSt AnNoYiNg OnE ).
 
 35) BE RACIST!!!!!!! ( yA wUzUp NiGga, eVeN wE YeLLoW!! )
 
 36) FiT 9 PeEpZ iN a CaR, wEn' ThE LiMiT iZ 5.
 
 37) wEaR a JaDe NeCkLaCe, EvEn iF yOuR nOt iNtO BUDDHA.
 
 38) ThErE mUsT bE a StRiNgY, oRiEnTaL-LooKiNg ArNaMeNt DaNgLiNg FrOm ThE
    MiRrOr Of YoUr SoUpEd-Up CaR.
 
 39) gUrLz--Be AbNoRmALLy ObSsEsSeD w/ SaNRiO ( kErOpPi, HeLLo KiTTy,
    PoChAcCo, PeKkLe, ETC... )
 
 40) BE RACIST@@@!!!### ( fO' dA LaSt TiMe)